Thursday, July 17, 2014

lights off & sweathers on


LIGHTS OFF & SWEATERS ON
I talk a lot about my superior greatness and how special I am and how Baby Jesus loves me above all others and how I can live on 50 watts of solar power a day and the last winter I only used a single five gallon tank of propane to heat the B-POD.  One might get the mistaken impression that I am just gifted and this stuff is easy.  You actually have to work at it.  I watch the power usage like a beat cop patrolling for vagrants and other riffraff.  The lights are allowed on from dusk to bedtime.  If we wake up the next morning and it is too cold to go up to the trailer ( having my comfortable thrift store $20 recliner back, away from the evil clutches of the stepdaughter, it is now a slice of ecstasy to relax upstairs during the day ), the lights do NOT get used.  I don’t care if the day is sunny, the day after that might not be.  The penlights are used ( the Pit has two small windows on either end.  It is never pitch black inside, but you are moving about in gloom ) and to read there are book LED’s that clamp on and use AA batteries ( it took awhile to find a book lamp that was an LED, not a filament bulb, and used standard, not button, batteries and was affordable ).  When the battery controller light turns green, only then are we allowed to turn on the overhead light.  That is how you survive on so few panels and batteries.

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And when it is cold inside, averaging fifty degrees with regular coffee brewing ( forty to forty-five otherwise ) unless we are in an extended cold snap, we don’t play Yuppie pussy and turn on the heat.  You stay bundled up in the winter, even inside.  Sitting around with little activity, I need to wear the same amount of sweater I do when I’m outside in fifteen degrees in the sun out of the wind at work- a thin wooly under a thicker one.  We also wear beanies inside most of the time.  Outside, I wear a polyester cap under a wool beanie and am warm. Or, my new preferred mild winter head gear, a genuine Eastern European Commie Cap.   In severe cold I have my rabbit fur hat.  During dinner, the place heats up from cooking and then the heater goes on for an hour if needed.  I bath-uncomfortably, granted.  Fifty-five to sixty is a gold plated bitch for bathing but sometime it doesn’t get any warmer.  And that is how you don’t use much heat in the winter.  You stay bundled.  You do the Jimmy Carter in the White House wearing a sweater bit.  My dad hollers he will never wear a big feather down parka in the house, whenever the heating bill issue comes up.  He also grew up in southern California and is forever spoiled in a “lounging about in a T-shirt” way.  I say, it is far cheaper to buy a wool sweater than to pay a heating bill.

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16 comments:

  1. granted,oh hairy wonder we adore,an extra blanket,or a simple jogging suit is much cheaper,in the long run.But,the body burns more calories to keep warm than your micro bread can supply.

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    1. I'll just slap some rancid shortning on it

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    2. I live pretty much this way now, except that I do have power in my old mobile home. The furnace died five years ago and as an experiment I tried an electric tower heater plus cooking heat. The best hint is to keep your feet and ankles warm. Even sleep in socks! And tights under heavy sweat pants for leg warmth. Now I understand why pioneers never took longies off until spring!

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    3. I hate sleeping with any clothes- I want my skin to recover and breath. I think a 24/7 elastic as in socks or underwear will damage skin and/or circulation.

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    4. Since you have grid power 7:46, you might consider an electric blanket? They work well, and I don't think that they draw all that much power? I have also seen the DC versions that plug into the cigarette lighter for sale at the sportsman's guide. This would be good for Jim.

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    5. That has got to be a huge drain on a battery. My down comforter works just fine

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    6. Yes, good point, bad suggestion for James on my part. The down comforter that I got from sportsman's guide for the delightful sum of around $25.00 also works just fine.

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  2. I feel for u O'curly locks! Me 'ole inna ground measures 26x40', forgot to load the woodstove before bed one night last winter and i like to froze to death @62 F. the next morning when i rolled our just before daylight, wuz inna teens outside..

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    1. I make it sound like the cold really sucks- and it kinda does. But it will REALLY thin out the herd soon and I must keep reminding myself of that.

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  3. Is the ex-wife still there?

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    1. She is still here, as a roommate and paid security for while I'm at work. Since I'll probably never find another bitch willing to crap in a bucket, her presence isn't a deterant.

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  4. Chad Z Father of NineJuly 17, 2014 at 6:31 PM

    When my wife took our 9 kids to visit her family early this spring... I set the thermostat for 40 for the rest of the house, closed my bedroom door and opened a window. I just burrowed into a mountain of blankets. Just my mouth peeking out. It was great. No grogginess when waking up... Cold weather will thin the herd.

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    1. I love how everyone uses frozen pipes as an excuse to never turn the heat down

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  5. Jim, how about digging more 10 x 10 holes and renting them out? Speaking of crap in a bucket, how are you dealing with it after that? I remember you "running afoul" of the health department assholes in the past - any trouble since then? Do you use one of the seats for a five gal bucket or do you suffer from ring around the butt?

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    Replies
    1. I use an old camping toilet lid. Turds go to town.

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    2. Hmmmm,'round here so do assholes..~

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