PLASTIC HOMELESS
*note: The next Bison Book Batch is out. Passive Solar & Morality And Offensive Tribal Strategy. Both new books, not posted here. http://amzn.to/2DWc1Tn
*
No, not figures of
homeless people cast in plastic.
Although that might be the next Pet Rock. Hoymal The Hobo, Bob The Bum, Harry The
Homeless-collect them all! No, just a
lesson from the homeless on using plastic to good effect in winter ( with a
propeller beanie hat tip for the Minion idea ).
I normally don’t consider the homeless as anything more than a Life
Lesson. If you continue to smoke crack,
you’ll be freezing your dingus off next winter, not even having a cardboard box
to live in ( Home Depot has had its stock increase eight times in just this
year alone. Which is a total of three
weeks, in case you are also on crack.
They’ll soon go out of business and there go the appliance boxes ).
*
Who knew homelessness was
a viable life choice? If all you want to
do is drink yourself into a coma, and don’t have Nicholas Cage money to go to
Vegas to do so, just go homeless near an intersection that Yuppie Scum traverse
as they scream down the road in their BMW to the Starbucks or their Make Work
office job, and panhandle. Their
subconscious guilt at making ten times the combined amount of money three
Mexican families do, each with five children, will keep the donations pouring
in. All you need do, besides pick the
right location, is to not bath. Since
this would interfere with your Maddog 20/20 ingestion time, this is little
sacrifice.
*
The homeless way back in
the day was real. They were all crippled
up and had leprosy where their bits and pieces were falling off, or there
simply wasn’t jobs for them. Of course,
I’d also imagine the alcohol consumption was also as widespread as it is
now. When life gives you lemons and you
make lemonade, and then life pisses in
your glass, sometimes the best course of action is to crawl into your
cups. The difference between now and
then is that if you just drink a little less today you could get on sweet
welfare. So it really is a choice, now.
*
The only ones who have no
choice are the really bat crap crazy ones.
The bastards who should be in the mental hospital, but those are all
closed down because it simply wasn’t efficient for states to keep the upkeep
and expense. Better to load them up with
pills, then they lose track of time, forgetting to take more pills, and then
before you know it you are urination over a bridge, naked, with a years worth
of grease and dirt on your skin to protect yourself from the cold. The homeless that are just trying to kill
their liver as quickly as possible might have enough mental facilities
remaining to realize that you can stay warm better without body grease.
*
They don’t actually stay
warm, but they do stay warmer. While the
church is open during the day they can drink free coffee. Some convenience stores let the bums drink
coffee instead of throwing the old stuff away.
Lunch might actually be hot soup at the soup kitchen ( I don’t think I’ve
ever actually seen the soup kitchens in Carson City or Elko serve soup ). At night, after collecting money from the
motorists, they have booze to keep them warm.
In short, they have some hot items to help heat their body core for a
time ( the booze just makes it feel warm ).
And in-between those times there is plastic to keep them warmer.
*
We’ve all heard of the
plastic Wal-Mart bags used to warm your feet ( after the illegals come up here,
using the bags as suitcases, the homeless pick them up to use them as foot
warmers. And, BTW, thanks Wally, you
heartless scumbags, for thinning out the bags so much now that they tear like a
square of wet TP, worthless for recycling use ). The best footwear for that is wool socks and
rubber outers, but the homeless get their cotton socks from the church or the
dumpster ( when they get their underwear from the dumpster, the stains don’t
matter. They are going to soon soil the
things anyway ), so they need to add plastic bags for waterproofing and warmth
reflection.
*
But even better, and you
have to actually give it to these guys for thinking on this one, is a plastic
sheet. Not a trash bag. Not a rain poncho from the dollar store. An actual plastic sheet like you’d use as a
drop cloth for painting. Then you have a
wind break, a shelter from the rain, and heat reflector to wrap around your
body. This is your Lesson From Bob The
Bum. Have a sheet of plastic for winter,
along with bags for your feet ( you might even use another bag over your
head-no, not your face-for heat retention ).
*
This is not meant to keep
you alive by itself. It is meant as a
supplement. It increases the
efficiencies of the clothing you already have.
The lesson is NOT to use a plastic sheet exactly as Bob does, it is just
a lesson on how easy it is to keep WARMER.
No matter how good your boots and socks, would bags help in wet
conditions? Yes, I know you want to
factor in keeping your feet from sweating.
That is very important-sweating can make having bags MORE
dangerous. I’d probably just focus on
the sheet, myself. But if you do the
research ( on how cold kills you-the convection or whatever terms I can’t keep
track of ), the bags might be an option.
*
But just the sheet alone (
as well as ALWAYS dressing as if you’ll suffer a car breakdown and be stranded
in the snow-NOT dressing as if you live in Los Angeles and are headed to the
beach ) should be one of the first things you put in your Get Home Bag. We put enough money towards the homeless (
your state and federal dollars at work, going towards paying a fat lazy bitch
to fill out paperwork to feed the homeless when it would be oh so much cheaper
just to triple everyone’s Food Stamps amount ), we might as well gratefully
learn this one lesson from them they learn through natural attrition.
*
I’d love to see all the
homeless move to Southern California and Las Vegas, burying the places in their
black runny feces, but that isn’t going to happen. Like all of us, the homeless don’t like
change. So, keep watching the northern
latitude bums for cold weather tips!
END ( today's related link http://amzn.to/2DFOCVO )
* By the by, all my writing is copyrighted. For the obtuse out there
Lot of homeless here , and I see them on a daily basis.
ReplyDeleteUsing those plastic bags for rain protection too.
A lot of wild woods in Floriduh, even in crowded suburban areas.
No worries to me tho... I'm much more concerned with the ones in houses surrounding me.
Yes , also those of the darker tribe which inhabit those of lessor financial means. I'm a few miles north of them, and about a half million yuppie scum live directly south next door. Lots of easy Pickens...
See, even in warm rain they don't want water touching their skin. I just don't know what it is with them and not washing. Tribal identifying marker?
DeleteIf your half assed proficient at camping-hobo style. Can stay somewhat sober and off hard drugs. There is ways of living around the edges of a functioning society. Slothy america has enough scraps and throw aways you can build a camp like third world primary residences. Pick up work for small money under the table by businesses or individuals can provide cash for food,etc. Not ideal, but look at that picture when waiting at a light in your comfy yuppy s.u.v. circumstances can befall any one and end up there.
ReplyDeleteThat is why I simply adore my Junk Land Living program. You CANNOT be homeless. It is much easier to live in third world primary residence style with solar hot water and light and indoor sleeping.
DeleteLife’s gotta suck a little extra hard for the homeless here in Kalifornia, since we’ve just about outlawed those small plastic grocery bags. Now when you go into a grocery store you have to bring your own bag, or buy one that’s “green”. A lot these homeless types are actually professional panhandlers, but a slightly aware person can easily tell who the real homeless are. Not too far away in the town of Stockton, there are entire homeless tent cities. Every now and then they will just disappear, after enough complaints I suppose. I think that the real homeless are generally the mental defectives. One of the more unusual cases that I can think of was my cousin’s stepson. Harvard graduate, and living on the streets after staying over the limit at the shelters. The dude ended up offing himself. His mother that had a severe stroke, and has lost most of her cognitive abilities, does not even know that her son is gone. I suppose it’s fortunate in that regard.
ReplyDeleteI have seen those space blankets in packs pretty cheap, so that could be an option when you can find a good deal on them. As is, I seriously doubt that they’re as good as claimed, but in conjunction with layers, they might work out okay.
I knew a crazy ass Jarhead who tested out the space blanket in winter. He had on a T-shirt and shorts, then sat on a chair and wrapped himself in the blanket with a tea candle on the ground inside. Stayed that way for hours until the candle was gone. I guess that isn't really a true test of JUST the blanket and body heat, but I thought it was pretty cool ( winter was Oklahoma, lows in the 20's ).
DeleteI ended up getting some of the upgraded versions of these blankets. One version had a poly-tarp on one side. Another one that I got much later was called a “heat sheet” and had a thick layer of plastic bonded to one side. These upgraded versions are more durable and thicker, and not too expensive. Combined with a blanket, they might actually be pretty good. But I never bought into the claims that even the standard version would keep you warm in the ridiculously cold weather that they claimed that they would.
DeleteThis is one of those materials that was a by product of the space age (mylar). Remember that in lost in space that they used to wear suits made out of this stuff?
Now if you got the sleeping bag version of this space blanket and lined it with a real blanket, they might actually have potential. Just don’t get the cheap version that will tear on you. Something like the one in the link below might even be good to stuff in a bugout bag.
Emergency Survival Mylar Thermal Sleeping Bag
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01HGV8R50/ref=sspa_dk_detail_0?psc=1&pd_rd_i=B01HGV8R50&pd_rd_wg=cB2OV&pd_rd_r=7H8JQFJB1W014N7N4NW7&pd_rd_w=NrGlZ
Right, like everything else the claims are at the least loose with the truth. Like the MPG on a car, the unemployment rate, etc.
DeleteI was homeless once for about a year. I spent the first six months "couch surfing". A few days here, a week there. Finally I ran out of people who were willing to Host. Luckily I found a Burger King that had gone out of business. It had one of those portable storage building out back. It was about 10 by 15 feet and had a barn roof. I decided to stay a night or two but ended up there another six months or so before I got on my feet.
ReplyDeleteI went dumpster diving every day and before the first week was up I had a comfortable sofa to sleep on, a coffee table, end tables, A ghetto box radio to listen to, ice chest for food (and beer). I even decorated the place with framed pictures and fake potted plants that I'd found.
I lived so close to the back of a grocery store I could hear them open up the big bay door when they threw crap away. They wasted A LOT of good usable food. Sometimes I would take a dumpster dived tv dinner into the 7-11 across the street and ask them if I could use their microwave oven. Wish I would've had a camera the first time I did this. They didn't know what to think about someone bringing their own food in to nuke.
I only had a couple of scares ALMOST being homeless and that "scared me straight". Out here it would be easy enough to do, just a half mile past the river away from a road you could live in a dug-out and still be close to town. Glad I don't have to, though.
DeleteSince you mentioned get home bags, this is what I carry in mine for bare minimum shelter...
ReplyDeletehttps://www.amazon.com/dp/B002CQUA6E/ref=twister_B005JPT9OO?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
I have it flat against my back, which keeps the creases fresh for folding back up, and any other objects that are sharp or bumpy from digging into my back.
Peace out
Looks like a good deal.
DeleteJust thought I would add a comment on the use of plastic sheeting. A pretty warm shelter can be built using plastic sheeting, tarp and a Mylar type space blanket, using the concept of radiated heat. (It does depend on having a fire.) Search for "Mors Kochanski shelter." He's a Canadian wilderness survival instructor. Thanks for the blog, James. Always interesting reading.
ReplyDeleteThanks, I try. Some might say I try too hard:) I think the Mors guy has a series of books. I'll check it out.
DeleteMy spouse found a craft using the old grocery bags and spinning them into a sort of course 'yarn' and 'knitting' them into a larger blanket like thing. I will see if I can get a couple links to it. There are apparently seniors that spend there time making these and donating them to the homeless in some cities. If one has the materials and time (lots and lots of time) one could do it for oneself.
ReplyDeleteNow that you mention it, I did run across that recently. It would be about the only use for the cheap ass bags. Come on, Wally, you aren't even the cheapest anymore-you can't cry Po' Mouth.
Delete