Tuesday, December 16, 2014

80's Cheese


80’S CHEESE

Just before I went home for the weekend, I was reading Commander Zero and his take on an 80’s survivalist movie:


Well, as fate would have it, I’ve had a VHS copy of this movie waiting for a sunny weekend ( I ordered it around a month ago when I read the review in the $30 apocalypse movie book ), so I was a bit bummed I spent $12 on it when it was posted on the Web.  But, life is like that, or at least my life, so I soldiered on and watched the thing and I can sum up the movie in one sentence.  Do NOT under any circumstances watch this if you want to see a survivalist movie but by all means please do if you want to see an 80’s cheese fest flick.  There were a few lines thrown in to make it seem like a survival movie, but this was mostly a biker film.  Strange that by 1987 they were still churning those out, unless it was old footage from earlier movies they reused so they only needed about half the run length in new film ( there is little doubt this was done on the cheap, although to be fair everything about “No Blade Of Grass” was so much worse it makes this one much easier to watch and recommend ).  And, just as an aside, it was quite easy to see why Jerry Ahern didn’t get credit or a check for this one.  There was NOTHING here remotely like his books.

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Low budget 80’s films were made with a very simple formula.  Boobs and bombs.  Or, more correctly, mammaries and machineguns.  I for one loved the hell out of all movies in the 80’s, but I was also the demographic they were targeting- twenties.  Of course I didn’t see what they were doing to manipulate me and everyone else that age, but it is easy to see it now.  Men were portrayed as macho and “strong silent type” as ever before, but with a difference.  Now, there was no love or respect for women.  They were portrayed as mere receptacles.  And were punished for not listening to their betters ( in The Survivalist the wife was told to lock up the house as Tillman went into town to go to his bank deposit box.  And of course, since she didn’t listen, five minutes later, scene stealing from half the 70’s movies, the house was invaded and she and the daughter were killed.  When Jack arrived home and discovered this, he spent all of ten seconds holding her corpse, then rudely flung her down as he cried out his daughters name and fled to her bedroom.  Message delivered: you bitches who don’t listen are easily replaced.  Which, he does readily not too long after ).  You couldn’t have had a better audience for that than 80’s young males, as the workplace was already aswarm  with females taking over and/or getting special treatment from Political Correctness.

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I’ll continue this next post.  The one after that might be my annual tirade on Christmas.  I haven’t made up my mind just yet.

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8 comments:

  1. Sounds like something that Mystery Science Theater 3000 might have spoofed James :D

    Sometimes you can find these movies in their entirety on youtube James. If you use firefox, and have the download helper plugin, you can download them and watch them later.

    Interesting link below on the women's movement, that you might find of interest? It includes a video of a programme that originally aired on the BBC, and predicted 30 years ago what the end result would be.

    http://www.rooshvforum.com/thread-43119.html

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  2. Ya, 80s where the Ssshhiittt for all sorts of manly movies. Predator, Rambo first blood, red dawn, etc. Most likely this was what helped me become a Marine. Running around busting shit up! Lol!

    On a lighter note. You consider writing off your book purchases as a small business investment along with your writing? Just a thought. Peace

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    1. My Amazon commission comes as a gift certificate which I buy my books with. Personal items I buy on the debit card. That way the only writing income that gets taxed is book sales and blogger ad revenue. One reason I switched to this way was because my tax people went from a tax return for business for $30 to $90. I figure I'll get, maybe, $500 revenue next year. Now my writing is for "free" books rather than for cash.

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  3. Ah, cheesy 80s VHS movies. Good times.
    Everyone was convinced through the whole 80s that the evil communists were about to launch a nuke strike that would force most the world back to the stone age. Then, the Gorbachav, peristroka, glasnost, the fall of the berlin wall and iron curtain, the reunion of the germanies. And people thought we some how 'won' a war on credit with no real spoils..... Then in 2001 we got slapped in the face with the 9/11 strikes on NY. And we have come to discover that their was a new war that we cant win - against the 'terrorists' and our own people labeled that by our government.... Such simple innocence in the 80's.

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    1. I'm still mulling over why we were so innocent and happy in the 80's when the red threat was real, then in the 90's after they went away we had to be slapped down and cowered by the government.

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  4. A decade ago I was an over-the-road trucker and would often buy DVD's at truck stops. I found a double set titled something like: 20 apocalypse movies, or something close to that. It should have been titled: The Twenty Worst Apocalypse Movies Of All Time.

    I thought of mailing it to you at one time, with a note attached that would say: "This is obviously only for if you start drinking again". I didn't get it mailed to you, but I still laugh at the thought of what you might have have said in all of your 'review' posts!

    With the end of the Woodpile Report, there's only a few Golden Boys left worth reading in/on/upon/about the survival-sphere. So keep posting. You're a bad-ass and don't even know it.

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    1. Don't know about badass, but dumbass I can believe

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