Thursday, January 23, 2020

burial bliss


BURIAL BLISS
Ah, caching. A solution to many problems. Now, unfortunately, it seems like caches have gotten almost all bad press. All we ever do is whine and complain about how the government is going to find those buried items and steal them, or, we will lose them, or a shopping center moves into your area and the spot is covered. I only really have one response to all those concerns. “The alternate is worse”. You are going to lose SOME, but if you don't bury your goods, you will most likely lose ALL that you cannot carry in you bug out.
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I'm not ridiculing your concerns. I've shared them. The only thing that really changed my mind was the new epidemic of crackheads and losing gear out at my Bison Pit Of Doom ( so named by a clever minion, in acknowledgment of my underground hovel to combat the cold ). It wasn't the up to $2k lose of propane tanks and solar panels and such. When you store multiples of multiples for everything, a small lose is stressful but not enough to endanger you. No, I was more concerned over further loses that had no resale value.
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The wheat is worthless now, but priceless later. No one would steal books now, as there is no market for them. But the reference library will be invaluable later ( one hopes that I picked the correct ones, and it wasn't just all topical blog subject material ). After that got my panties in a bunch, then the dingus lickers on the left started RedFlagging everything. I hadn't really been concerned with weapons bans before, as I had no semi's, but now they wanted ALL guns. Time to get extra serious about burying everything of high value.
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No, that doesn't really mean burying books. If you recall that from Lucifer's Hammer, you remember the books were put into zip-locks then dropped in a septic system. Did anyone else notice the problem there? Zip-Locks are NOT a perfect seal. Anyway, I'm not sure how much the books are worth in a rebuild situation ( as in, building a cottage industry economy. Not replicating anything like now. Forget industrial processes like sheet glass or artificial fertilizer. And that is BEST case. There might not be ANY rebuilding, being a Dark Age and all ). I focus on social sciences rather than practicalities like engineering, mostly. The library is mainly just useful to my growth, rather than societies.
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I would love to bury everything, as anything above ground is going to be a target eventually. I just cannot do as much digging as I used to ( for you new readers, I dug the pit for the hovel by hand, 10x20 by 6 foot deep. It took me a year, after work, working on all but the coldest days ). Burying clothes and other bulk items might never get done, so I'm starting with the highest values in guns, ammo and silver.
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It isn't rocket science. Oil as needed, evacuate air, multiple layers of plastic and a shell to keep that plastic from being compromised, and bury deep enough there isn't condensation formed. You can do the vacuum seal bags or the oxygen absorbents. Plastic bags/buckets or Mylar. PVC pipe or any scrap material to prevent punctures ( anything above 4 inch PVC is WAY too expensive except for high value firearms ). The silver coins you could put in anything to keep them together and toss in a hole, but we all like shiny things and plastic will keep them from tarnishing.
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Now, to the dangers. Of course they exist. Walking down the road poses a danger, especially living in an urban area with a diversified population. Relying on a job or pension is a risk. That doesn't mean you stop taking a risk, as long as you are minimizing them. You don't make just ONE cache, and that spreads out the danger. No, you don't dig two holes in the backyard. You dig one there, hopefully under a future slab of concrete, and then one off the property. And another one at another location. And etcetera.
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Americans have remained too secure in their dwellings for too long. We think our house is our castle. We think that castle, and insurance, is security. Well, sorry, but that ain't crap, now. You saw how well the bankers ( insurance IS a banker industry ) screwed us all twelve years ago. You are paying double property taxes and triple school loans and quadruple health care because of bankers pilfering the economy. And surely you see how insecure your home is from the government? Bars on the windows and a shotgun might deter burglars, but what is deterring the SWAT team?
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Just blind luck at this point. You can no longer own a secure safety deposit box at a bank ( if you live in a city big enough to have a private deposit box, you are probably in too big of a city ). It is far too easy to lose that to either the IRS, bank, or government jackbooted thugs. So you must hide and bury. Will the government find them with metal detectors? Or even a jerk snooping around as a hobby? It is possible, but less likely than above ground seizures. We have this mental block that if our precious is close to use, hidden in the wall or buried in the back, that we can monitor it.
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But to what end? To be an eyewitness to its theft? Or to discover sooner that it was taken while we were at work or eating out? At some point you need to have faith that digging is hard work and most of the time will not be undertaken. I understand the allure of having access to your treasures so that you may stroke them lovingly and reassure yourself how safe they make you. But I also know you know as much as I do that intelligently buried treasure is MORE of a feeling of security.
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As a minion pointed out recently, having a lot of expensive crap that is vulnerable makes for constant anxiety and irrational behavior. He was speaking of suburbanites and their McMansions and such. What seems to be forgotten by most suburb inhabitants is that fleeing the cities was White Flight, and that doesn't work anymore as OtherColors are placed in your neighborhood with Section Eight by communist government workers wishing to ruin your investment. You can bet THEIR neighborhood retains its value, but yours will be the future home of a mosque.
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That suburb you live in has taken on bonds in the tens of millions, and in the very near future will be so broke not even basic police or fire will be funded. You “invested” when you should have just been short timing the residence on your way to escaping to a far more rural home. This lesson also applies to ANY valuables you have at home. That expensive gun safe? Not so safe and a big target. Better to fill it with ammo so it cannot be moved, and have all but a few guns buried ( bury plenty of ammo, also ). Actually, a safe full of lead for reloading might be better!
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Burial is bliss. A shovel is your friend, even before there are any actual burials that need to take place ( you know, the Shoot, Shut-up, Shovel variety ).
( .Y. )
( today's related Amazon link click HERE )
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35 comments:

  1. Slightly off topic, but burial related. From the movie, Where The Lilies Bloom:

    An ill Roy Luther, upon showing daughter Mary Call, the casket that he made for himself.

    “I want you to promise me something Mary Call. When it comes my time to die, let me go peacefully. No doctor, no undertaker, no preacher. They just take money.”

    Not a bad movie. It also features that babe from WKRP In Cincinnati, Bailey (Jan Smithers) whom I always thought blew away in the looks dept, the chick that was supposed to be the total babe in the series, Jennifer (Loni Anderson).

    But it mostly reminded me of what an incredible racket the funeral and medical industry in the US is. I’m hoping that when my time comes, I’m way out in the wilderness somewhere. I can also depart with a smile on my face, knowing that they didn’t profit off my dying and dead corpse. In the words of minion ghostsniper: Fuk em Ded (That should probably be patented :D )

    Where the Lilies Bloom (1:37:09)

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JX4q1g94kuo

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    1. Baily is the gal you want to marry, Jennifer is just a drunken one night stand.

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    2. Yes indeed Baily had legs all the way up to her tight little butt. It's to bad in real life she liked to lick the carpet than to suck the sausage.
      When I found that out I think I cried for a week after wasting my high school years "thinking" about her.

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    3. "Thinking" causes you to go blind, right? Is that why everyone is so friggin retarded?

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    4. Interesting. I did not know that. She was married to a dude for a while, but I’ve noticed that it’s a common recurring theme, for old hollyweird actresses, upon divorcing in middle age, to go lesbo (The chick from top gun and witness, did just that).

      Oddly enough, the dude that she was married to (James Brolin) later married Barbara Streisand. That makes absolutely no sense to me, and I don’t care how much money the bitch has, I wouldn’t touch her with Richard Simmons penis (Well, Richard Simmons wouldn’t touch her with his penis either, but you get the gist of what I’m saying :D )

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    5. Fashion up a snazzy casket all blinged out like they do in some cultures, use that as a screw you to heirs, ensuring the cheeries of your estate gets buried instead of your carcass (cremate and have an ol hooker pal set up to spread your remains were you had the most fun) put all of your best kit inside, seal up, leave in garage or shed, arrange a swithceroo and it gets put in an undisturbed cemetary forever and gets over on every one lusting after your merchandise at the will reading. Ha!

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    6. According to IMDB Bailey/Jan has been married to 2 doods with 1 child, and currently has been divorced since 1995. So keep on thinkin'-and don't get none on ya.

      Yeah, fuk em ded is patented, and trademarked, and the copyright is in the mail. I actually got that from a crazy anarchist, that supposedly told Bill Gates what to do back in the 90's when he worked for Microsoft, that I knew in the political usenet newsgroups.

      Regarding all this caching business, if you ain't permanently caching the most important thing you own, your ass, then you are wasting your time. I'm thinkin the tyrants have a whole mess of people to tend to before they get way out here to bother me. IOW, location, location, location. Yeah I know, "jobs" are problematic out here in the sticks but if you're dependent on such things then you most likely won't make it out here anyway. You gotta have balls, and brains. Job? Please. Why would any sane person rely on one income stream? If you cache yourself first nothing else will need burying.

      I drew my will up about 10 years ago. I have veterans benefits but won't use them in that regard. My wife will have my ass cremated and the ashes will be stored on the bookshlef on the stairway landing leading up to the 2nd floor where the urns for all of our pets sit. The person hasn't been invented yet that is more frugal than I. Not cheap, frugal. There's a diff. Cheap is trash. Frugal is inexpensive. Learn the diff.

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    7. I was cheap with my hookers, got married instead, and spent a LOT more in the long run. Frugal is better. And cheap would be going to Bangkok-not a good move

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    8. 11:41-can Richard Simmons resist her if she bends over and backs towards him, winking?
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      The other 11:41-very elaborate and convoluted and mean. I love it!

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    9. I tell everyone that when I go to just throw my body in an industrial bin. I'm not even joking. Don't waste a cent on my corpse. My soul would have gone to Heaven and the broken down flesh and blood machine no longer needed

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    10. I have two dug holes ( 8x8, 12x12 ) I'm not using. They were a lot of work to dig. I want to get thrown in one of them.

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    11. If I die I hope my family has the courage to bury me and sell my ID to some deserving soul or keep cashing my SSI check like I am still alive.

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    12. Even give it to some bum. Better a wino than Halliburton.

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  2. Right Jim. Good book links as well for Minions. I would posit that a fellow be very very paranoid (not hard, default posture nowadays if one is street smart) as to opsec.

    I ping on the Ted Binnion Vegas-Pahrump Nv fiasco of his doper ass murdered for buried silver. I would probably exclude (yes, it would be better really) family and chums from knowledge of your cache and locations. That wife, kid, gun buddy may rip you off later as relationships do change, just nature of things. If you die off and a cache is not recovered than oh well, better that than the ol lady's new boyfriend or errant spawn kids getting at it. You bought-aquired it, buried it, it is your pirate treasure to do as you see fit, not for some redoubter's keyboarder advice on "how things should be done".

    Stay Frostiest.

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    Replies
    1. Nothing has any utility, after you die. The most expensive treasure is but a hooker and blow vacation, given it changes hands long enough. Perhaps a future slave digging a hut foundation uncovers the silver and can run away to freedom. Better than a crackhead cousin wasting it.

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  3. “I dug the pit for the hovel by hand, 10x20 by 6 foot deep”



    I’m probably not adding any additional information here that everyone here doesn’t already know. But ideally your junk land will be hilly enough to provide a few areas where you can build a dugout or two. I’d keep it simple and small; say, 8’x8’. You dig down 4’, then cover over with straw flakes, then lightly with earth. Over time, vegetation will provide cover. Try to hide the entrance as much as possible. In addition to a cache burial, for an easily accessible storage above ground, a shed is a consideration. But it has to look really crappy, such as something that Jed Clampett, or the Our Gang members, put together. In addition to false walls and floors, you can get creative, and have various unlikely to be pilfered containers laying about. Perhaps a porta-potti, with a piece a fake crap on top, but with a usable item below. Or some boxes or containers with some very unappetizing titles, such as “Bruce’s colostomy bag recycling” or “Big Bertha’s dildo collection”, but you get the picture :D Again, this is just for intermediate accessible items. Actual valuables, along with main food storage items, are cached.

    Amazon sells a variety of fake containers for stashing stuff. Some of them are rather creative. I have one that is a large bolt and nut. The top of the nut screws off, revealing an opening big enough to stash a few bills, or any other small and similar items.

    https://www.amazon.com/s?k=secret+containers+to+hide&crid=38ZMJ70SUH1QI&sprefix=secret+cont%2Caps%2C372&ref=nb_sb_ss_i_5_11

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    1. Don't stash anything in Gay Male Porn books-we all know wasteland marauders swing that way

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    2. Yeah, that totally sounds like an awful time to be alive. I’d hate to look anything like the golden boy. Can you imagine being bleeped up the backside, every evening by a dude like Wez? A prostate exam with a jackhammer would probably be a more delicate procedure :D

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    3. A cache that is like a mini cottage, with all of the basic a to z items to need and generally use, as if you got air dropped in at and then had to stand up from scratch an operation. Think of a short chock full, stocked up, r.v. type of image of scope involved. It would be a labor of love with time and costs, but sure would be an ACE card to have. Stuffed in a mine shaft or mountain crevass outside of Elko so as to have early upfront boxseats of the Bisonia Empire.

      But that would be redoubters only realm. Buy your salvation via gear and losing innate skills and perseverence, which will be more in need post apocalypse, than having a gerber 65 piece multi folder knife tool mcgyver thing. Just thinking here.
      Stay frostier.

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    4. 11:01-thank goodness I'm no where near pretty enough. The hair is perfect, not pretty

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  4. Here's a seldom seen pik of Bailey.
    https://i.pinimg.com/originals/f5/9d/e9/f59de921d9d6b4d3bbddd460e7aa542f.jpg

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    1. Hmmm, perhaps too young. Nothing compared to later. I see the mainstream media was fluff and crap even back then

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  5. The best cache is what is called a "pickle barrel". Though they really had peppers & onions in them.

    You can find them in black(50Gal) or orange(45Gal).

    Orange has a better lid.

    When buying them make sure the lid and (very important) the ring fit and screw all the way down.

    The lids are mad either from a hard plastic or a almost rubber/plastic type.

    The lid WILL NOT take the weight of dirt on it when buried.

    You must make a heavy cover that goes over the ring.

    Use a rubber sealant to seal the lid on the barrel.

    After burying the barrel, then place items inside.

    You will not un-bury the barrel later, so have something to carry supplies with.

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    1. Look around for people selling containers for water.

      Also where people sell barrels that had pop syrup in them.

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  6. I was away for a while and wasn't up to date ... crackheads raided the original Bison's Lair? That's infuriating to hear.

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    1. This was two years ago this month I believe. They keep nosing around, but that was the big theft.

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  7. A mountain man told me that back in the depression era, homeowners would bury their money so they could see it from their back window - so if you every want to metal detect around abandoned houses . . .

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  8. James, can you give us a write-up on your tobacco stores? How are they doing? I'm thinking of doing the same for the future.

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    1. Still sealed, still moist. The NOL is smoking a cig now out of the stores-I'll update. What has it been? Four, five years?

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    2. Okay, the NOL was amazed how fresh it was. Slower burning ( moister ) and better tasting ( "just opened the bag" taste ) than what I regularly roll her. When I open a bag from the store, it takes weeks to use it all up, so the cigs get rather dry and old. So, basically, this is a perfect storage method. Just really jam the tobacco in there, the more the better. If I recall, it is half a pound into a quart jar. Put the lid/ring on and it forms its own seal. Easy, peasy.

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    3. I buy the cigar tobacco (cheaper than cut for cigarettes due to taxes) and use the tubes. But for SHTF, I plan to use rolling papers and filters instead of tubes because they're easier to store and take less room. Until then, I'll use tubes.
      Based on your experience, I'll be filling some quart jars with tobacco and quickly.

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    4. Pipe tobacco is lower tax, also. Family Dollar is carrying now if you want to try it out. If you like it, online is a little cheaper ( but, shipping ). A pound online, $12. 6oz Family Dollar, about $6. The company I used was $30 shipping, so I had to buy 4 pounds and a dozen cartons of tubes to justify the freight. I stopped checking the Feather Indian Rez as their prices are only pennies below after tax off the Rez White Boy prices.

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