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Friday, May 5, 2017

fat boys


FAT BOYS
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Being fat today carries a lot of stigma, even though really what you have are less fat people called fatter people too fat.  With the diets we are mostly forced into financially, not the fast food diet of old because that excuse flies about as well as the “the whole economy is going to crash and burn because we sell things online” one, which is to say it is feeble research carried on by feeble minds by people that shouldn’t say anything but never had anyone put a fist into their mouth to stop any garbage from leaking out and so because justified violence is never allowed anymore in our feminized cesspool of a society the rest of us have to listen to crap like that all the time, but rather diets consisting of food no matter how supposedly nutritious really carry very few and are more empty calories than anything else, it is hard to not be fat ( a body craves more nutrition so consumes more calories ).  The only people skinny enough to escape the label are those genetic rejects that actually confuse meat eating apes with rabbits, and they have such a superiority complex about making the wrong choice diet-wise that you want to run their lank corpselike body into a ditch and pummel them unmercifully but that would be unsportsmanlike in the extreme.

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You know who else eats nothing but bunny food and doesn’t have an ounce of fat on them?  Ornamentals who evolved eating rice and vegetables since someone sometime back made a seemingly rational but ultimately unwise decision to take the Quantity Over Quality equation to its extreme, thinking vast armies of stick people were military advantageous.  They might be right, as the area hasn’t been as unduly overrun by invaders as Europe has, but I’m not sure why anyone would covet the location anyway.  History seems to favor the temperate to extreme climate dwellers over the tropical ones.  Not that I’m declaring to revisal of the “cold over hot climate racial superiority”, since Eskimo’s seem to be in no danger of overrunning the world ( and since half of China is cold ).  But there might be something to Fat Over Skinny superiority.  Fat is what you want from your females, giving them the advantage breeding, and enough fat to supplement muscle on a warrior can also be advantageous in most circumstances. 

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We’ve lost sight of the advantages of fat for no other reason than bitches now be in charge, and bitches declared it is now fashionable to be skinny.  That was fine when it was propaganda directed at themselves, Girl Power in no way halting or slowing catty infighting and it is always every gal for herself and the fight to win the alpha male is relentless, but now gals demand that males should not only desire skinny bitches ( not that there is anything wrong with them if they got skinny the right way, like not eating every cheeseburger in sight, but evolutionarily, Darwinist Selection speaking, skinny does mean problematic breeding ) but that we should be skinny ourselves.  That is their only defense against superior body strength, to breed us into weakness, our slender frail rice eating looking body unable to knock the crap out of them when they go on Social Justice Warrior mode or kidnap the kids to get an extra paycheck.

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And, sadly, this relentless propaganda has seeped into the Survivalist movement ( well, so has Yuppie Scum-ness, so it shouldn’t be too much of a surprise ).  Be skinny, we are told, not fat, else the masses of starving zombies will target you for your supplies!  Now, obviously when I speak of fat, I’m not talking about Pear People fat, which is all fat and no muscle.  I’m talking about fat enough to have endurance for prolonged battle, but not enough to kill you as you wheezily jiggle atop the couch playing Sony Playstation Call Of Duty Apocalypse Zombie Edition, your heart weakened by fried Twinkies and relentless masturbation.  Well, okay, speaking of pleasuring yourself, if you get to the point you have to move your stomach to fondle yourself, AND you most times would rather drink a Dr. Pepper and eat a Moon Pie instead of rubbing one off, you might just be too fat.

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But otherwise, fat is good.  If you can retain fat ( a fat belly on a slim body does not count as that is just your ass having been sucked up and fronted at middle age ) then you have the body type that should do very well during an Apocalypse.  Being all muscle and no fat is just as bad as being no muscle and no fat.  Believe me, needing constant feeding because of a fast metabolism, almost needing to constantly wear a feedbag, is no friggin fun at all.  And come collapse it could even be dangerous.  If you keep fat on, you need only make sure it stays in reasonable range and thank your good fortune.  As for being an indicator after the collapse, I ask that you consider your location.  Why are you living amongst starving strangers?  That doesn’t sound like a very good strategy.  That sounds like a “bug-in” situation, ill advised for many reasons, chief among them is that crowds blow elongated engorged Rhino member.  You should be staying away from people.  Do you really think you want to smear yourself with diseased zombie intestines so you can go stumbling around in a crowd of them?

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Fat is good for your tribe.  The skinny ones will probably die the first winter as they started out with so few less reserve calories ( obviously fat alone can’t get you through the winter-but it can be a decisive factor ), regardless of how skilled or valuable they think they are.  Us scrawny ones had best be stocking up on that Crisco now, and securing a source of fat for later, regardless.  And when you pick a gal with to raise post-Apocalypse children, pick a hefty one.  Do your kids a favor and put some damn permanent meat on their bones.  Skinny is desired by bitches flaunting their wealth ( or their husbands ) since they alone can afford a gym membership and much more nourishing food, along with non-quack doctors.  Don’t fall for their hype.

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4 comments:

  1. His Lordship and High Grand Poohbah Lord Bison,

    Would you ever "go gay" if only you and another man survived the destruction of civilization? Let's say that this man is 5'11" with brown hair, blue eyes and a very fit build. He is also in his late 30s.

    -Anxiously awaiting your reply.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You're just trying to make me feel good aren't you?
    While I'm no blob, I also ain't the lean mean killing machine I was in Uncle Sam Ain't Released Me Yet. Been adjusting my intake/output since the 1st of the year but have seen little result. Takes FAR, FAR more effort to offload the excess than it does to accumulate it. In the past 10 years my knees have become worse and worse and I'd like to lighten the load I place on them. I'd like to avoid going to the VA and having salaried, surly gov't employees that can't make it outside replacing them if at all possible.

    As my ol' gray haired Pap used to say, "People go to the VA to die.", and then he did just that.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Spammed your offer far and wide.

    I hope it got you more minions

    ReplyDelete
  4. I always recon when faced with a looming catastrophy gorgeing ones self as much as posible would be a good survival option.

    Aussie

    ReplyDelete

I must moderate-trust me. You don't want to see what happens otherwise. Sometimes it takes awhile to respond as I only check two or three times a day. No N-Bombs, nothing to get me libeled. Otherwise, have at it. If you criticize me, make sure to praise my hair first.