this is only a test

THIS IS ONLY A TEST

Well, that was an “interesting” week ( in the Chinese curse sense ).  After me and the immediate boss ( not the boss of the whole shebang ) blew up at each other, something I shan’t get into, the next morning when I come in I’m “offered” half time.  I don’t know if this was actually voluntary, to help me with my stress level, or if it was going to be mandatory, but I snatched up the offer without any questions.  I don’t know if this decision was offered in sympathy or spite.  It doesn’t matter.  For far too long things at work have gotten more and more stressful, the typical management expectations of more and more far past the actual point it is physically possible.  Every last one of you who has ever worked for a corporate structure knows exactly what I’m talking about.  Since they only understand the Growth Uber Alles paradigm, it is frankly inconceivable to them that worker peasants can’t continue to outperform their past achievements every record cycle ( this is one of the reasons I loved Shindler’s List, for the scene where the commander times a Jewish slaves assigned task then shoots him for having not performed at that splendid time every time.  I don’t think Spielberg meant it as a corporate riff, but it perfectly encapsulates the entire mentality ).  These are the people in charge, so you can kind of understand why we’ve increased speed as we hurled over the Gore Warming cliff.

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I should have requested half time years ago.  It would have saved me quite the bit of stress.  Now that it was presented to me as a done deal ( or, to sound cooler in French, fait accompli ) I can go with it easier though.  It has been ten years of working at a minimum 60 hours a week- not including commute time.  Granted, for ten of those ( and many prior to that ) it mostly all went to the ex-wife.  But afterwards, wanting to finally enjoy the fruits of my own labor, I was not willing to give up any money or hours and kept up the grinding pace.  Now, as soon as I learn how to relax again ( something I haven’t seemed to be able to really accomplish since about 1990 ) I can enjoy a life with much less stress.  If I can relax.  My afternoon hours were given to another new worker, and while he doesn’t seem like he could take my place in the morning, you never know.  The sub-boss might really have it in for me and I can’t tell because, you know, guile and sneakiness being a gal thing, us guys usually have no clue when we are being played by the opposite sex ( like the last wife.  I don’t know at what point I crossed her line in the sand, but obviously I did some time ago.  It seems she’s been screwing with me for some time.  Still haven’t heard from her.  Oh, well, I just miss the sex, not the drama ).  So, I’m living frugal once again and saving money, just in case.  No money worries at all.  Not even at half pay.  I invested quite a bit into consumables and preps the last two years, so I’m golden.  Weird how everything I plan for turns out working in unexpected ways.  But always to my benefit.  I can live on $300 a month and save the rest and still be flexible and comfortable.  It will be a good test for a real emergency.  Again.

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