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Friday, December 18, 2015

prepper partners and procreation


PREPPER PARTNERSHIPS AND PROCREATION

Note: Look for a Saturday post tomorrow.  Too good of writing to throw away, nonetheless not really a worthy entry for a weekday.
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As per Idaho Homesteaders last of the previous list of article ideas ( thanks, sister! ), the pros and cons of dating as a prepper.  How do you tell them and what if they have kids?  Now, I must admit, I might not be the best person to give advice on this.  Not because I’ve been old school in my relationships of one a lifetime, but because I have a very good “cheat” I use.  I never lead with, “Hi, I’m a crazy rat bastard and I think the world is going to end and I expect you to listen to me ranting about gas masks and freeze dried foods”.  Rather, I just explain that a lot of my time and effort are devoted to my “real” ( but not very well paying ) job of writing.  This accomplishes several things.  It explains my lack of career ambitions.  It tells her first thing that I’ll be busy with a second job and I can’t just sit around scratching my ass waiting at her beck and call.  It shows how hard working I am.  And, when she asks the inevitable What Do You Write About, I can painlessly ease into explaining about prepping for the Apocalypse.  The one relationship I had when I DIDN’T do this, I was never able/allowed to prep.  All those following that ( the dreaded Ex #2, for those of my long time readers that remember ), prepping was never an issue ( and neither was whether they had kids or not.  I also told them I wrote about frugal living, so they knew I was cheap, and hence I was able to contribute to the household and their kids financially with much lower expectations-I could still be a primary breadwinner, they just had to live my lifestyle ).

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Actually, dating as a prepper is so much easier than being married first, then becoming a survivalist.  Dating is just in essence a series of interviews and you as a whole package are being evaluated.  In a job interview, if the boss is okay with a request such as “I can work anytime but I need Friday afternoons off to visit my mother in the nursing home”, they don’t necessarily like it but they will go along with it because of all your other positive traits.  Same with a Mating Interview.  Not everything you do needs to be received at a 100% enthusiasm rate.  The whole package is what matters.  If you “dress up” your prepping, like I did, the “sell” is easy ( of course, I think my size 11 boots make up their minds first, but I could be wrong ).  This is where the advice on winning over a reluctant spouse is actually going to work ( in a marriage, you have one of two kinds of mates.  One, they jockey with you for dominance.  You’ll never be allowed to prep so go read my book on Survival Divorce.  The other one is a partnership where your needs are given consideration.  Selling prepping will never work on the first and on the second you shouldn’t need to sell ).  Just soft sell the whole thing, or camouflage it.  You know, like “being into camping” or “enjoying shooting” or “working towards a homestead for a tree hugging lifestyle”. 

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This is a great idea not because lying is a good idea ( lying is like losing your virginity-it can’t be undone and you can’t go back ) but because, HELLO!  You are dating.  If it doesn’t work out you don’t need some crazy bitch telling all her friends where to go with their crackhead boyfriends for collapse supplies.  In my case I can kind of relax as my preps don’t look much like anything other than one step above a junkyard ( plus, I don’t blab until we’ve reached the point we both know it is Bumping Uglies time, by which time we know it is going to be a relationship.  I’ve never done One Night Stands ).  Don’t lie, just wait for the conversation.  Before they’ve committed, but after they want to.  If you are twenty years old and have raging hormones, none of this will work.  You are still hopeless.  But for the rest of us who can date and mate more responsibly, I think you can relax about the whole thing as long as your timing doesn’t suck.

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14 comments:

  1. So let me get this straight. You don't just have nice hair?

    Seriously, I had a heck of a time getting my wife on board. She isn't one of those domineering types, but it took a while. That and spending money on it back when the kids were young and I didn't make that much money. (I wasn't as cleaver as James in figuring ways around lack of money.) Y2K was when she climbed on board. Being an IT professional, I was able to show her what was up. I was making more money too. Now she helps me plan stuff, has a concealed permit and has become more like her old man :) Woe unto the Jihadist(s) who want to shoot up the theater where we are. We may die, but they wont get off unscathed. Noticed when they tried that nonsense here in Tennessee, a guy who had a pistol, in a no gun zone I may add, fought back and slowed the attack. A relative of mine who was unarmed fought back and died. This would have been worse, except for theses guys. Also in Texas. Oops they died before hurting anyone. Yes it was the cops, but goes to show an armed person can really screw up their plans.

    On the Y2K note. When I hear people say "That was anon-event" prepping is dumb, I say it was a non-event because WE fixed it before hand. Duh! People tend to forget that stuff.

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  2. Today Wally world has free shipping, no minimum you can get whole wheat i.e your recent post on getting supplies from Wal=Mart. With no shipping its 3.7 cents a pound and no buckets, or anything else needed just put it in a closet.

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    1. 3.7 cents an ounce. If more readers read the comments they would have seen your notice. So sad, too bad.

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  3. "And, when she asks the inevitable What Do You Write About, I can painlessly ease into explaining about prepping for the Apocalypse. "


    I was going to advise against the use of such words as "apocalypse", but you sort of already addended that in the soft selling it section below. Homesteading certainly sounds a little less "unabomberish".


    As a single male prepper, I've pretty much given up on having a spouse. I'm too tired and demotivated (not to mention, misanthropic) at this stage in my life to work at anything beyond a few hours a day at my computer, for small beans, bullets, and bandaids change. So my lifestyle and career drive are woman repellers. My homestead will at best be the equivalent of your original homestead. The current plans that you have for the "female friendly" homestead upgrade are far beyond this preppers budget.


    Who knows though? If I live long enough, even what little I have might be enough to put me into the new wealthy class?

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    1. I was where you are no not too long ago. I can't believe I actually found someone. Of course you pay a price.

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    2. You can make up somewhat for lack of budget with greater input of time and effort (and skull sweat)...

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    3. Lamb meet Anon 4:39. Anon 4:39 meet Lamb. Two single preppers, one blog, it's destiny. :)

      Idaho Homesteader

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    4. 4:39 here. Thanks for pimping for me IH; you seem like a good egg.

      As stated above however, I'm a gentleman of less fortunate means and motivations (In layman's terms a bum, hence the woman repellent part above). Though I was educated in one of America's fine bastions of higher learning, so I'm an enlightened bum if that's any consolation?

      I'm also prone to on occasion, consuming large volumes of spirits, resulting in loss of consciousness, followed by my awaking in a variety of unusual places, and often various elements of my attire to be unaccounted for. But I have fun :D

      I might be considered a type of “catch”. But the “lucky” recipient would would likely wish to release me back into the wild shortly upon taking
      receipt ;)

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    5. You'd be surprise at what women find attractive. The fact that you have a preparedness mindset is very attractive to those of us women who also like being prepared.

      After having folks look at you like you have three heads just because you think it might be wise to have a little stored away for a rainy day, someone who doesn't mind a bucket-of-wheat end table would be a blessing.

      Life is short. Doesn't hurt to role the dice and see what comes up. Might as well have fun with it.

      Plus, Lamb seems like a realistic, prepper type person. Why not consult the stars or tea leaves and see what they say.....

      Stranger things have happened.

      If it works out, let Jim be your best man ;)

      Idaho Homesteader

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  4. Go ahead.Focus on the men. I am now single again. In decent health, prepper broad...but when *I* bring up "homesteading" (I don't use the prep word...it just makes things worse),guys look at me like I just spoke a foreign language!
    At my age, though, I don't expect to find anyone anyways. Just gonna go it alone. I was prepping on my own when I was with my ex, anyway. Might as well do it just for myself!

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    1. Sorry for the bias, but I am a guy as are 99% of the readers ( as far as I know ). As for being too old, I doubt it. Looking at 90%+ of gals over a certain age, most are bitter foul looking creatures. If you are in decent health I can’t imagine you being alone if you don’t want to be. I know, dating blows. I got lucky this time around, but I’ve “been there”. Sorry, I might be projecting my phobias on you. For me, being with someone is preferable to being alone, regardless.

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    2. I know some pretty charming older ladies. One is 80 and another 103. They were probably "hot" and charming well into 50's, and nowhere near foul-looking even at an advanced age. Attitude is about 60%, with avoiding obesity and pharma about 30% more.
      Oh yeah, financial independence gives more dating options. Almost all of the old ladies I know are widows at some point. Alcoholic men drop like flies in their early 60's.

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    3. Alcoholic men in their 60's wish they were dead 10 years earlier due to their wives. Just saying.

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    4. I am familiar with many whiny crotchety control-freak old B's who were instrumental in the deaths of their men. Avoid all contact.

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