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Thursday, March 26, 2020

getting anal-post 1 of 2 today


GETTING ANAL
No, this post is not about toilet paper. In fact, if its a choice between calories or TP, I think there should be a ban on TP ( and bottled water, frankly ) until every grocery store in the land is groaning under the weight of dry foods. If that happens. One of two things will happen. My nightmare inducing normal everyday paranoia is justified and we are all going to die, or the Grand Solar Minimum folks are full of crap and Go 'Murica, Capitalism, and in the weeks the public is confined to quarters the Great Replenishment happens. My vote ( not my first choice ) is doom. My hope is I'm badly mistaken.
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I don't care if I'm wrong. What harm is there? You bought some more ammo, or food. You can never have enough. You got junk land. So what? Vacation and retirement. But let us be realistic. You all do NOT need me to call the apocalypse or not. You are reasonable intelligent minions. Perhaps some of you must move your lips when you read my words, but I don't think those types get information from blogs. YouTube is more their speed. But, OY! Some of the YouTubers right now! Shut the Hell up already, simple humps dropped on their heads as babies, no, we do in fact NOT want to listen to you streaming for two hours. You have at most ten minutes of information.
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Always with the taunting headline, but when we start to listen you are blah, blah, hello Stephanie, hello, John, glad you are joining us and let me tell you about the dog turds I picked up this morning and Get To The Damn Point Already! This is entertaining to the newly unemployed? They don't want a video on coppicing or middle ages farming or something to fill up the idle hours? Analysis is all fine and well, but don't make it into a full time job waiting for your nuggets of wisdom.
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Anyway, talk about running at the mouth like a rabid dog, this article is about becoming anal compulsive. No one likes That Guy. NOT the life of the party. And look, I won't even make any jokes about those Jarheads and their programming. My magnanimous nature once again displayed for awe and inspiration. But, it is time to get serious about resource management. The logistics is probably toast. Now it is just about managing what you have. It is time to Stop, Drop, and Roll. Roll up all those pretty pony lifestyle assumptions of abundant cornucopias into a tight little ball and stick them where the sun don't shine.
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Once it began to look like the trucks were not keeping up with quarantine shoppers, I went Full Retard on Operation Tight Ass. Time to start acting like I'm actually dipping into my never to be replenished stockpiles. My beautiful hair that is the envy of the doom-o-sphere? Gone. Out with the High And Tight, in with the one size buzz cut. Less soap is now needed washing my hair. You might not think that will make a sizable difference, but then, you are a Fracking Forever Fanboy, an Optimistic Ollie and a lackey of Red Shield, aren't you? It makes ENOUGH of a difference, one tiny sliver of soap at a time.
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Just a few days after my last toilet paper find, the bottle bidet was rolled out and has been in use every time. I still indulge in the luxury of a tiny squares of TP to first remove solids and last to soak up most of the water ( and double check my efforts ), but it is ten percent of my former use. I won't skimp so much I endanger health. That is a wee bit important right now. Dish soap was already homemade laundry soap, which doesn't foam, but the NOL insists on SOME store bought dish soap in the mix. I started refilling the dispenser, so it went from a 50/50 mix to a one third store bought to two thirds homemade.
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I had been using a napkin to pre-clean my cowboy coffee pan ( cowboy coffee eliminates most of the acid, which I need to do with my heartburn. And I am cutting back on the Tums by eating zero junk food. Nothing processed, and then only tomatoes need an antacid ), but I cut that out. The only difference is floating coffee scum in the pot full of dishwater. And I don't even NEED paper napkins. I talked NOL into cloth ones years ago. I don't need them for TP, either. It is just a desire to work on eliminating sloppy habits.
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The down side of course is that I have to really bite my tongue with the other members of the Dysfunctional Award Finalist Tribe. No TP to be had anywhere, and certain Coneheads are STILL wasting it as if a TP Fairy is going to drop some off tonight. I cannot say anything at this point, as I cannot threaten them with food restrictions, and if I employ corporal punishment I'll be arrested. So whenever I am “blessed” with their visits I lose a half roll of TP. Grrr! It is a tragedy of the commons play every time.
*
I love rolling potato wedges in breading to get a delicious dish ( the days of grease drenched tators are sadly over ), and you all know how exasperating it is when there isn't enough flakes to coat the item. It is normal to bury under the breading to ensure complete coverage. But, no more wasting! I have to be rather niggardly with my use and so must carefully place a small amount in the rolling dish, then constantly add a little bit more. I do NOT take the attitude of “just use it up and enjoy it while you can” ( while tators last, sadly )
*
I'm trying to make everything last. Tiny, baby sips of the mouthwash. A bare smear of the toothpaste. Carefully measured out ( yes, I use an actual measuring spoon ) sugar in the coffee ( and a carefully measured out amount of coffee ). I'm even putting my socks on more carefully to get a few more uses from it as it becomes holey. Now, to be fair, being a tightass financially, all of this was at least touched on pre-Virus, even if not religiously adhered to. I've just become WAY more focused and dedicated.
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I'm even being more careful to not waste my scratch paper, which is all from the mail in the trash. As I said, if I'm wrong, great. This will simply be another amusing story to tell. But if I'm right, this is a great start on husbanding my resources.
( .Y. )
( today's related Amazon link click HERE )
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note: I'm more excited than a teenager in a whore house!  My son is working at home in his underwear, was getting bored and started exploring the family tree.  My grandfather was from Sparks Nevada ( until the war, where he most likely stayed afterwards, in California ), but even better, my great grandmother was from Elko Nevada!  How cool is that?  Perhaps a small reason why I've felt at home here, family roots?  It isn't THAT exciting until you realize how few people lived here back in the day, and how I got here by accident ( good ads on E-Bay for land ).  
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note: I don't agree with 50% of this, but the other half is pretty scary.  Made more so by the fact YouTube obscured the search for it rather well.  "We have no food for you" HERE 
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note: well, I'm a slow learner but not a moron.  Second day in a row I'm out walking and questionable gentlemen try invading my personal space at 4:30 AM.  Far less cars on the road today than yesterday.  I guess I'll be hopping on the exercise bike for ten minutes first thing, to wake up, then go walking as it starts getting light out.  90% sure if I wasn't armed this morning it wouldn't have ended as well.
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note: Amazon is getting weird with its algorithm which used to recommend books based on other buyers choices, but now is using your own history.  Not sure what that means.  Even the sponsored books aren't related, as if they are running out of folks buying ads and are desperate to make a sale.  Why am I surprised things are going off the rails?
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36 comments:

  1. Right Jim. Resource conserving within your own compound is really more paramount than uber shopping for more, and running technical excel spreadsheets cataloging your palletized goods stored in the barn with the cavalry unicorns.

    By this week all of those prior "hoarder" shopping foray goods are surely consumed up, and the normies will think the stores should surely be restocked for just them by now. We are not far removed from Venezuela conditions. Folks have to wake up and have some coffee with that new reality breakfast. Be miserly and husband those supplies like the draw bridge is up for the rest of the year, or forever.

    And a re advisory note on the defcon alert, personal security rules apply 24/7, in or out of the compound, even more so now as conditions occuring are ripe for spicy times. Stay alert-head on a swivel. Plan accordingly. Stay frosty.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No one should be out of food or money, yet. But the vultures are already out. People are already chasing away folks in their yards. In the daytime. For the first time since I've lived here, I don't feel safe with just a knife anymore. It isn't just a bad vibe anymore but observation.

      Delete
    2. Well then your Spidey senses or lizard brain is correct. This is where going through hoops for the concealed firearms permit, (yeah 2a rights folks got it but have to use the state laws of a.o., or else) so as to be strapped with sidearm like a third arm, AND, be permitted in case of more likely run in with a twitchy L.E.O. than scumbag interferences. Like a border pass upgrade for spicy times. Holstered carry if necessary, it will only look obtuse for a short while, then be commonplace. My tinfoiled hat persona and n95 mask wearing while shopping is now considered wise and reasonably prepared under new norms. Ratchet up your arms race, gear and mental, cause it is kinda warfare out there. Stay loaded and frosty.

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    3. I will admit that for the first time in a long while, I too feel the need to carry around the house. My everyday carry blade is a Boker Automat Kalashnikov 4" folder.
      Now I'm back to also putting my little NAA 22 mag revolver. Small enough it conceils well but barks loud up close.
      Shoot , I always carry out in the woods but that's a .45 and I ain't quite paranoid enuff yet to carry a five lb cannon around the house. Tho one of those or better is in reach anywhere inside the hooch.
      Not going more than a hundred yards from home for awhile it don't look like.
      A friend gave me a couple more laying hens recently, talked me into taking a rooster cuz I ain't got one and might be wanting fertile eggs. Little bastard was out there on top of the motorhome at 4am crowing his ass off. Like come on down , free chicken dinner here y'all.

      Getting the can kicking vibe too. Even if so , best double down spending some reserves for the interim hiatus hmm

      Delete
    4. 9:09-Think of it as a public service, being the trail blazer. Once one person has the balls to go against the mainstream, others feel comfortable joining.
      *
      Spud-I'd feel stupid packing heat inside, but I'm starting to give it more thought.

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    5. Before my accident , I used to carry the NAA anytime I had pants on. It's so small it fits in a front pocket and you forget it is there. There for a long time anything extra believe it or not was too much weight. Now not so much...so I figured it was time to get in the habit again.
      Things being what they are, well... can't hurt to always have something besides a blade.

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    6. I miss the days I could go to the pawn shop and buy a $60 pot metal pistol, no background fees. Even if it jammed after the second shot it was great for a pocket pistol for pocket change.

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    7. Yeah those NAA's aren't exactly cheap. But they are quality at least.

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    8. Every step of the nations collapse, each round it gets more and more expensive to defend yourself. Only the rich are worthy. Those of us smart enough to live below our wage level and save can afford to defend ourselves, but not the average Joe.

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    9. James,
      You'll feel pretty damn smart at least having a pistol within reach around the abode once the home invasions start in your hood.

      Delete
  2. I read that sewers in some large California cities are getting clogged because people are using cut t-shirts as toilet paper. And flushing them down....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And these are the Brain Trust we rely on to keep the gears of civilization turning.

      Delete
  3. “ I'm out walking and questionable gentlemen try invading my personal space at 4:30 AM. 90% sure if I wasn't armed this morning it wouldn't have ended as well.”


    Huh??? How did you stand him down? Details?

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    1. Yesterday, I heard the guy on the BMX bike coming up on me from behind. After turning around, he turned off as if he was headed that way anyway. I'm thinking he was going to ram my legs to put me down. Must have aborted after detection. It was not an area he would be at, as it was a detour from the main road, which he turned back towards. Today, I see a guy coming a block away. Main drag, but no traffic ( very unusual-I think a lot of miners aren't headed to work anymore ). I switch over to the other side of the street. Coming closer, he ALSO crosses the street, asking if I have a cigarette ( half way across ). I'm exercising, why would I? So I'm on full alert, and place my hand on my knife. He then veers away from me, telling me "Relax, man, just asking" blah, blah. Still mumbling as he walks away, offended I was so paranoid. It could have been harmless, but no bars are open, right? Sure, he could have been coming from a friends. That's why I gave it a ten percent chance of being non-threatening. But he wasn't a homeless guy. He ( and the guy yesterday ) looked too "capable" I guess is a good way to put it. Like this wasn't their first rodeo. I'm not fooling myself thinking I looked like too hard of a target. It probably was innocent both times. But it is enough of a warning that had they been more stealthy I would have been toast. Last week I was startled by what I thought was a bum going through trash, not ten feet away of the sidewalk. Looking back, I wonder now. It was a pretty good ambush point. I think several cars passing then saved me. I can take any of the homeless guys. But those have disappeared and this new batch is worrying. Traffic and cops kept me unworried. But not now, after this morning. Who gets multiple chances like this? I'm lucky.

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    2. They may appear as innocent interactions, but more likely probes or precursers to a larger offense or opportunist actions. These skells will bum a smoke, all along plotting or seeking opening for a major score. I put the lazer beam observation and guard up on everyone. That fat old lady walking the dog by may just be a scout for her posse home invader crew, one of whom is her daughters baby daddy kind of scumbaggery. Gloves are off, no more mister nice guy these days.

      Delete
    3. I see. I wouldn’t have expected that in a town like Elko, but with a population approaching 20K, I suppose you’re going to have at least some seedy elements. From your description, it totally sounds like those jokers were up to no good. I’d stay on the main thoroughfares, and choose hours where the most people are out and about, even in consideration of current shut down conditions.

      I have one of those NAA mini revolvers. But here in a blue state like Commiefornia, the consequence's of being caught with it is severe, discouraging me from carrying it, and so I’ll take my chances without it. People always like to trot out the

      “better to be judged by 12 than carried by 6”

      trope. But at my age, I’d rather be dead than to spend even a few years in prison. Especially the type of prison the dude’s from office space almost went to (Of the pound you in the ass variety, which is probably about the worst variety out there :D ) I’d carry some of that flip top pepper spray Jim. That’s the quickest to deploy, and then you don’t have to worry about the legal consequences of shanking someone.

      https://www.moderncombatandsurvival.com/firearms-2/legal-self-defense-judged-by-12-or-carried-by-6/

      Delete
    4. Funny, I don't very many dog walkers out anymore.
      *
      Last place to be in an apocalypse is jail.

      Delete
  4. Off Topic:

    "March 26 2020: National Forests in North Carolina temporarily shuts down Off-Highway Vehicle trail systems.
    These actions are consistent with federal and state health and safety direction to help reduce the impact on emergency responders and limit the spread of COVID-19. Use of the OHV trails strains emergency resources, especially search and rescue crews, at a time when the resources are already limited within the local communities."

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What else is S&R doing? Good practice now, for when they have to go find lost LEO's who tried evicting forest squatters.

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    2. Ha, they are using this as a means of putting citizenry on a literal plantation. Taking away more and more things to test the waters and tolerance levels of folks. Also a conditioning of the population to just follow more orders folks, for your own good and all.

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    3. I don't think they have that much control right now. And they already know what giant pussies we are, from "indefinite detention without charges". We'll see. If food magically reappears, but with a control mechanism, you are correct. If they let the riots start, I am. I'm not implying this is a contest. I HOPE you are correct.

      Delete
  5. re:
    toe-nails

    To reduce wear-and-tear on socks, I use a twelve-inch mechanic file with fine teeth.
    I file to shape, then angle-file (from the knuckle) to bevel.
    This softens the edge of the nail.
    A bonus -- few-to-zero snags while donning.

    I also use a lava stone on rough areas of my feet at the conclusion of my shower.
    After a few minutes of worshing and shampooing, my feet skin is nice and soft, so using the lava stone helps to smooth those rough areas.

    As an aside, I have a sock fetish.
    I own many dozens of identical socks... no problem mixing them in the dark before going out to feed the animals.

    As a semi-related aside, I also have a towel fetish.
    I own many dozens of 'hand' towels.
    I prefer that size because they are multi-use -- kitchen and sinks -- and they dry quicker than 'bath' towels.

    Now, you know everything there is to know about me... and my linens fetish.
    On 'senior discount' Tuesday, you could usually find me in the towel section of stores such as Ross, Marshall's, and TJMaxx.
    Except... these days, you can roller-skate in the parking lot and not see a single vehicle.

    One door closes, a hundred doors open.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank goodness! I can think of a LOT worse fetishes. :)

      Delete
  6. That video . . . food, food, food, food. Look at any upheaval in history. Food.

    And . . . toilet paper?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes, Rome fell after the TP ran out and they went to using sponges :)

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    2. There is no doubt at all in my mind . I fully expect a false recovery her in the near future. Been informing all around to take advantage of it !
      Use that fake printed up stimulus money to stock up on all the food you can get your hands on. Be careful tho.
      That Orange devil is already hinting that he wants to steal from hoarders...keep this in mind and be discreet.
      I'm seriously thinking of going dark here...

      Delete
    3. All the news was that the bill was passed ( for our $1200 ). But that was the Senate. Still needs to pass the House, who are conveniently quarantined. Boeing? Brrr, printing. The People? Sorry, printer broken :(

      Delete
  7. Jim, you were close to confrontation. The bike guy maybe, the cigarette i think so. You mentioned you were a taller guy so they changed their minds. A bullet in the gut and haul ass.

    Change up your routine though. Walk a little later. 430 AM nobody out there is there for good except like you a few walkers. Be careful.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 4:30 used to be fine, traffic out the ass with all the miners going to work. Even the ladies without dogs walked then, before. Now, yeah, definitely waiting for dawn.

      Delete
  8. Lord Bison, may your raven locks shimmer eternally. You need a heavy duty livestock cane and pepper foam for homeless scum. A small ball peen hammer carries easily and is very fast to draw and hit with. Homeless people are mostly scum, show them no mercy. They will show you none.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The homeless never worried me, except rabies. This new breed is more professional. Strangely, you don't see the homeless out now. Almost like they were chased off. Not sure it was by the cops, as the city gov is rather progressive.

      Delete
    2. Good advice from HD above Jim, but you really have to be careful from a legal standpoint. The hammer would for sure be considered a deadly weapon. Now under certain circumstances, of course deadly force is justifiable. But you’d better have a clear cut justification for its use. You’ll also need to explain in front of the DA and cat lady jurors, all with Biden 2020 bumper stickers on their cars (And remember. It’s already been established that Beto “Hell yes we’re coming for you guns” O’Rourke, is going to be his gun czar) why you were carrying a hammer around :D But you have to put yourself in the mind of the leftwing DA, as to what would be considered a deadly weapon.

      A better option would be one of those telescopic batons, or one of those leather saps (The one linked below is disguised as a coin purse) But even then, I’d still check my local laws. I’ve come to the conclusion that you practically can no longer defend yourself in the “land of the free”. Pepper spray is one of the few items that “I believe” is legal everywhere.

      Bottom line: It cannot be considered a deadly weapon, and if it is, you’d better have an air tight alibi to justify its use...


      https://www.amazon.com/Hide-Drink-Slapjack-Handemade-Warranty/dp/B07KJQNXX7/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=leather+sap&qid=1585316012&sr=8-3

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    3. While you better be deathly afraid of going to jail, we also need to accept the fact that this new normal is going to force us to take greater chances. I won't claim I'll do anything to stay out of jail, but I will think about it. BAU ain't coming back. It cannot. We are already accepting a lockdown police state. How much sooner until we start being disappeared? All I'm saying is that the rule of law is breaking down, and we better not be the last one abiding by it. Far after cops and criminals have disregarded it.

      Delete
  9. I like to walk my dog late at night, to avoid people (and other dogs), may have to re-evaluate that. Don't like to walk her when people are active, because she got attacked by a pit bull that got loose when a kid opened a door. Since the virus hit, I no longer can bring her to dog parks, which was one of my favorite things to do. I feel really bad for my dog.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. A dog is easy to please. She should like just walking with you. If she gets depressed, let her sniff your butt and hump your leg.

      Delete

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