mattress savings

MATTRESS SAVINGS

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note: Attention!! Attention!! It is that time of year again and I'm going to visit my folks.  All articles WILL be posted, so tune in every day.  However, no comments will be posted until Friday evening, nor will e-mails be answered.  I'm staying dark and taking a real break from hurting my poor brain. 
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note: Most generous snail mail donation from WI.  Is that RSC or RSL.  Damn heathens and your handwriting!  Anyway, you know who you are-many thanks, dude.
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The book “The Windup Girl” by Paolo Bacigalupi was rather impressive.  It was far more dystopia than it was post-apocalypse, even though it was recommended to me by the computer as PA.  A happy accident as the writing was so good that I didn’t hesitate to order most of his other books.   I couldn’t really tell you what it was about, having read it years ago, but one thing that cemented in my mind was one characters method of hiding a stash of cash. 

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I believe the location was Indonesia or similar, and the home was more of a small hand built affair using bamboo.  In the middle of the night the character acted all ninja and took a piece of bamboo from the rafters or wherever, and stuffed in a tightly rolled piece of paper currency.  It was a rather clever plan, until a fire burned down his home.  Oops!  There goes your savings.  ’Muricans are much smarter, recognizing the danger from fire insofar as flammable paper goes, and leave their money in the bank.

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Oh, wait!  How smart is that, again?  Remember how Might Makes Right?  Well, the bankers changed the law ( dipsticks like Hilary or McCain are political whores whose AIDS ridden rectums are always loose and pliable for the highest bidder ) and now “your” saving are no longer yours.  Not even close.  When you foolishly give your money to the banks for safekeeping, it then becomes theirs.  They can save it for you, lose it on another derivative gamble or, hell, they could spend it on hookers and blow if they want. YOUR money?  In your dreams.

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Now, yes, I keep money in the bank.  I hate to do so, but I need an account for electric deposits and as poor of a risk as the bank is, I need an extra location to save.  But I only keep 25% of my money in the bank.  You never know what will happen, so you keep your options open.  My other savings are another version of the Money Under The Mattress.  Cash on hand, hidden.  Not that anyone hides anything valuable under their mattress anymore, but everyone recognizes the old saying. 

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Do I like burying my cash?  Not especially.  Really, NO stash technique is fool proof.  Fire, theft, institutional fraud, water damage ( even if you have multiple layers of plastic, what if a big ass mudslide through your back yard-say, in California-whisks your savings away? ).  Even multiple locations, while recommended, are not fool proof.  I mean, I personally think burying is the best stash method, but you just never know.  Bizarre things happen every day.  BOTH stashes could in theory be discovered, paved over or destroyed somehow.

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The odds are low, and all this prepper stuff is just an increase in your odds, not a guarantee.   Just beware no stash method is perfect.  Which is why you always have more than one or two.  Don’t stuff all your wealth in one bamboo hut.  And be advised, this is just about paper currency.  Daily spending.  Precious metals, investments in tools or businesses, rent free land, supply caches, all these are separate subjects.  This is just a back-up to your bank savings.  Because we are SOOOO friggin over due for another derivatives meltdown, a petrodollar collapse, hyperinflation or some damn thing.  Assume the worst, for everything, to include the savings in your bank.

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When you stash cash, I would assume that water and fire are your primary worries after detection.  I think your best bet is to put the cash in a vacuum seal bag, if you have one, then in a Zip-Lock, inside a plastic lid covered plastic container ( I like peanut butter jars-just don’t use a metal lid because of rust ) which is itself inside another zip-lock bag.  Zip-Lock, not generics, unless you are pretty sure of your first heat sealed bag.  If you don’t think buying a vacuum sealer is a good investment, you can improvise.

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There are plenty of YouTube video’s on making due without a vacuum sealer machine.  Most focus on drawing the air out, or using non-specialized cheaper bags.  You don’t need to worry about the air part ( suck through a straw or displace the air by dunking in water ) but the sealer part.  Look up “sealing a bag with an iron”.  Not much more involved than a piece of tinfoil, but watch the video anyway.  You can use a ziplock, creating a better seal by heat sealing it ( I don’t much care for the quality of a seal with just the zipper, but that’s just me ), but I think the rolls of vacuum sealer bag are much better plastic.  You want very thick bags. 

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Bury your treasure, ideally away from plant roots that will transfer their heat downward during a fire, and up a slope rather than in a drainage area.  Most folks will probably use their back yard or underneath their house in the crawl space.  Closeness conferring perceived security.  Just remember, if the house burns down over the stash, the heat might potentially combust your stash.  You’d have to research how much dirt was needed as a thermal barrier.  And if the gardener or dog can get to the stash you have planned poorly.

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Only bury small bills.  Yes, it is inconvenient.  You can barely fit a thousand bucks into a large vitamin bottle with 50 twenty dollar bills wrapped in plastic.  It might take multiple trips to the bank.  But the Drug Prohibitionists have been bad mouthing hundred dollar bills for far too long.  They think it makes things too easy for drug lords.  You know, because they can smuggle bales of marijuana but when cash is five times as bulky their entire business model is ruined.  Friggin idiots.  I think that noise decreased slightly, probably because we needed to ship pallets of cash over to Iraq to bribe everyone.  But you never know when they might try to ban large bills to protect the children.

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India just got done outlawing large denomination bills, also.  I’m not exactly sure what that was about, but it is proof that politicians and the forces controlling them will not be reluctant to crash and burn the economy to get what they want.  Why risk it, even as a low probability?  And remember, more stashes, less eggs in just one basket.  Who knows, we could have an actual overnight collapse, despite the odds.  Then cash money won’t matter.  But it probably will, even if only for a short time.  Plan, act, pray.

END ( today's related link https://amzn.to/2rCTxj9 )

 

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